THANK YOU.

♪♪ >> SMASHING UP BANANAS AND A LITTLE SALT AND EPIFFER, SPRINKING SHREDDED CHEESE ON TOP AND POPPING IT IN THE MICROWAVE FOR A FEW SECONDS AND PASSING IT OFF AS EGGS TO MY CHILDREN FOR BREAKFAST IS DIVEOL CAL WORK BUT SOMEBODY'S GOING TO TO DO IT.

HAVE YOU SEEN THE COST OF EGGS LATELY?

I BROUGHT THE DOZEN I HAD IN THE FRIDGE TO THE STUDIO WITH ME.

MY CHILDREN CANNOT BE TRUSTED WITH SOMETHING THIS PRECIOUS AND EXPENSIVE.

I WOULD RATHER LET THEM PLAY DRESSUP IN MY TIFFANY'S JEWELRY AND USE MY GOOD CHURCH WIGS THAN TO LEAVE EGGS UNGUARDED AT MY HOUSE.

NOW, I DON'T KNOW ABOUT Y'ALL BUT I'VE BEEN PRESSED TO FIND WAYS TO KEEP UP WITH THE RISING COST OF EVERYTHING.

INSTEAD OF TAKING OUT A SECOND MORTGAGE ON MY HOUSE TO FILL UP THE GAS TANK, OR GETTING A PAYDAY LOAN TO PAY FOR A LOT OF OF BREAD, I GOT A SECOND JOB AT WCCO RADIO.

THEN A THIRD JOB AT THE "STAR TRIBUNE."

THEN A FOURTH JOB USING MY OWN COMPANY TO DO SOME PROMOTIONS WORK.

AND A FIFTH JOB WHERE I DO PUBLIC SPEAKING AT EVENTS AND FUNDRAISERS.

AND EVEN THAT AIN'T ENOUGH TO PAY FOR A FULL BASKET OF HOUSEHOLD ESSENTIALS AND FOOD EVERY WEEK!

BUT THEN I SAW A SIXTH JOB.

YEAH, MM-HMM.

THAT MIGHT HELP ME GET BACK IN THE BLACK FINANCIALLY.

NOW, WORD ON THE STREET IS THAT TINA SMITH IS RETIRING HER U.S. SENATE SEAT AND IT'S UP FOR GRABS.

NOW, I DID SOME RESEARCH AND GOOGLE SAYS THE JOB PAYS ABOUT $170,000.

AND YOU NLY HAVE TO WORK THREE DAYS A WEEK!

NOW, IF I ADD THAT TO THE FITTY-LEVEN OTHER JOBS I GOT I MIGHT BE ABLE TO GO BACK TO AFFORD AN 18 PACK OF EGGS NEXT TIME.

NOW, I WANTED TO LOOP MY FAMILY IN BEFORE I TOSS MY HAT INTO THE RING BECAUSE POLITICS IS SERIOUS.

I'D BE COMPETING WITH PEGGY FLANAGAN MAYBE EVEN ANGIE CRAIG OR ILHAN OMAR.

BUT WHEN I SHARED THE NEWS WITH MY EX-HUSBAND, HE WAS A TOTAL DEBBIE DOWNER.

HE TOLD ME, WOULD YOU BELIEVE THIS, ON VALENTINE'S DAY, THAT I LIKE TO FIGHT, CUSS, AND DRINK TOO MUCH TO GET LECTED TO SENATE.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT?

HE'S PROBABLY RIGHT.